Russett Road mallard couple befriends goose: all parties seized immediately by inexplicable urge to run in circles
Monthly, Applewood homeowner known to suffer idiotic traffic just to park, wallow ecstatically in wide Costco parking space
Conscientious Applewood homeowner opens online thesaurus in search of hip (?) new synonym for curb appeal, finds self instead captivated by antonym on offer: blame
Milestone fast approaching as Sherway Gardens security guards, paid duty police officers near to outnumbering shoppers
Applewood homeowner realizes surest way to rid backlog of sustainable grocery store bags: stop eating food
Applewood homeowner loves neighbours, trees, kids' schools, Longo's, but bloody hates living here in Mississauga
Token Applewood Luddite homeowner using said designation to shield sophisticated phishing scheme operating in basement, Call of Duty addiction
Applewood homeowner’s suspicion that Dentyne Ice ought qualify as super food supported smartly by AI if AI properly improperly prompted to agree
Pierre Poilievre, bullhorn cranked to 11, to kick off Canadian federal election campaign in pivotal 905 neighborhood of Applewood Acres
Future Wealthy Place Post reporter beams back headline from 2064: beep boop beep beep Applewood boop bee boo boop Applewood!
Homeowner’s daughter first in family to experience signature Applewood spring phenomenon: discovering mouse nest in inline skate
Affirmative invite response dispatched without even one exclamation mark draws birthday girl mother’s wildest suspicions
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