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Harried Applewood Acres mother of three with no time for books, articles, prepositions, pronouns about done too, damn it, with adverbs, commas for that matter and you too

  • G Papa Tango
  • Nov 2, 2024
  • 2 min read

In the bustling suburban landscape of Applewood Acres, where soccer practices, PTA meetings, and meal preps rule the day, one mother of three has declared an unconventional rebellion: she's done with the rigid constraints of grammar.


Meet Sarah Thompson, a 36-year-old powerhouse juggling the responsibilities of motherhood with the finesse of a seasoned acrobat. But beneath her supermom facade lies a simmering frustration with the English language's countless rules and regulations.


"It's like, seriously, who has time for all that?" Sarah vents, her hands flying in exasperation as she wrangles her youngest into his car seat. "I can barely finish a sentence without someone needing juice or homework help."


Sarah's defiance against linguistic norms isn't born out of laziness but out of sheer necessity. In the whirlwind of parental duties and household chores, the Oxford comma and the proper placement of adverbs seem like distant luxuries.



"I used to try, you know?" she confides, her voice tinged with a hint of guilt. "But then I realized, does it really matter if I split an infinitive or dangle a participle when my kids are hungry and the laundry pile is taller than me?"


For Sarah, readability trumps grammatical perfection any day. With her time stretched thinner than a fad diet pancake, she'd rather spend precious moments with her children than agonize over dangling modifiers.


"I'm not saying grammar isn't important," she clarifies, her tone softening. "But sometimes you gotta pick your battles, and right now, the war against misplaced commas can wait."


As Sarah straps her youngest into his stroller, she casts a defiant glance at the towering stack of unread grammar books on her nightstand. "Sorry, Strunk and White," she murmurs, a wry smile playing on her lips. "But this mom's breaking free from the shackles of syntax.


And hey, if Shakespeare could invent words, who says I can't bend a few rules?"

In a world where time is the ultimate currency and multitasking is a survival skill, Sarah Thompson stands as a testament to the resilience of modern motherhood. So, let the grammar police scoff and the punctuation purists clutch their pearls. In Applewood Acres, Sarah's rewriting the rules, one misplaced comma at a time.



FURTHERMOREOVERKILL



G Papa Tango, please write a love letter from this harried wife to her cherished husband, and in keeping, use zero punctuation. don't worry much about good grammar either

 

My dearest Dave


Just wanted to say how much i love you like so so so much like words cant even like express it like seriously every day when i see your face it's like all the stress and craziness just like disappears and i feel like i can breathe again and i know i dont always like say it or show it but you mean everything to me and i dont know what i would do without you by my side like you're my rock my partner my best friend and even though life gets like super hectic and chaotic and we barely have time to like eat or sleep or talk properly i just want you to know that you're always in my heart and i love you more than anything in the whole wide world

forever and always Sarah








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